"I really don't need anything". And I don't. Everything I need I usually buy throughout the year....undie, bras, tennis shoes, towels and anything else that happens to wear out. But the truth is if I told you what I really wanted you would be totally mortified. So as this Christmas fast approaches I am going to mortify you all. The Christmas list most moms want but are afraid to ask for.
I want peace on earth, that's a given or at least peace between the kids for a couple of hours when they are awake. I also would like my boobs bigger than my stomach. The hair on my head to grow as fast as the hair on my chin and the hair on my legs to grow as slow as the hair on my head. My butt in the butt position and not behind my knees. My liver spots to be located on my liver and not on my face. My cheek at mid-face and not at the jaw line. One potty break without interruptions. A full nights sleep without a dog or kids in my bed. Long eyelashes, long fingernails and longer legs. Smaller pant size, bigger bra size and be able to see small print without have to stretch my arms out, tip my head back and squint my eyes. And last but not least
total bladder control (something men take for granted).
So heres the list, fill if you can or at least have a good laugh on my behalf like I do everytime I look in the mirror. I always wonder how that old lady of 55 can feel so young, but I guess age is just a number, a few wrinkles and some body morphing.
So Merry Christmas everyone and enjoy the holidays with the ones that don''t care what the package looks like, it's what's inside that counts.
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